Trouble Sleeping? New Hotline Plays Weird Sleep-Inducing Sounds

What better solution to insomnia is there than listening to Steve Urkel sing you a lullaby?

A mattress company set up a free hotline for people who are having trouble sleep. If you call 1-888-890-2040 you have the following options:

Press 1 to hear the sounds of the ocean.
Press 2 to hear wind chimes blowing in the wind.
Press 3 to travel back in time to the 1990s.
Press 4 to undergo hypnosis.
Press 5 for a motivational speech.
Press 6 for a grandma who misses you.
Press 7 to learn the history of the cocktail wiener.
Press 8 to hear Steve Urkel sing you a lullaby.
Press 9 to merge into the conference call with the marketing team who came up with this idea.