Five Rock Movies That Need To Be Made

Hollywood saw huge success with Bohemian Rhapsody.  On May 31 Rocketman, the story of Elton John, will look to repeat the same box office numbers.  This weekend, Netflix released The Dirt, an epic movie about the craziness that was Motley Crue.

As we all know, Hollywood has run out of ideas.  And Hollywood will copycat success.  So with success of a couple of these type of movies, we should expect to see more like them in the very near future.  Here are the five that they should be focusing on.

Number 5 - Ozzy Osbourne
You might think this should be more of a priority.  I mean the stories are legendary.  Even the small scene in The Dirt was epic.  However, it also showed the biggest worry of any Ozzy movie.  You have to find the perfect person to play him.  That accent.  Those facial expressions.  The mannerisms.  He is one of a kind.  Get it wrong, and it's a huge flop.  Sharon Osbourne is planning a movie.  However, she says the movie will "definitely be a tearjerker. It’s not going to be a sex-and-drugs movie at all. Ozzy is so much more than that. I would hate to be a cliche.”  Screw that!  We want to see the sex, drugs and rock n roll part!

Number 4 - The Kinks
Two years ago rumors floated around about a movie on The Kinks.  They even had a director picked out.  Dexter Fletcher.  Dexter Fletcher just got done directing the Elton John movie.  So he has the background for it.  Why The Kinks?  Sibling rivalry cranked up to 10!  Brothers Ray and Dave Davies don't really see eye to eye.  Dave has been quoted saying "Ray's an a**hole".  Here is the part of the movie I want to see.  Ray throwing a 50th birthday party for his brother Dave.  During the party, Ray gives a speech about himself and then stomps all over Dave’s cake.

Number 3 - The Who
An amazing time for music.  An amazing band.  Stories that could fill a sequence of movies like it was the Avengers!  Keith Moon blowing up drum kits.  Chopping up hotel furniture with an ax.  Knocking out his own front teeth while naked on his 21st birthday.  That just scratches the surface of a movie that would have it all on the screen along with an amazing soundtrack.  Pete Townshend fighting with Roger Daltery before the band even started.  Pete fighting with Elton John on a plane.  Or maybe just Pete stabbing himself in the hand for "art".  Drama is what sells, and this band had a lot of it.

Number 2 - Led Zeppelin
The band that inspired generations of rockers with their influential music.  Their look and style and of course the crazy parties and oh so many women.  These guys invented trashing hotels and groupies.  Just google Led Zeppelin and Red Snapper.  While the focus of the band will always be Page and Plant, let's just remember that John Bonham rode a motorcycle through a hotel.  Twice.  This would be a great movie with a lot of good times, and bad times. (See what I did there.)  Also, they already have the actors for this movie.  Just get the guys from Gretta Van Fleet.

Number 1 - Guns N' Roses
This one seems so obvious.  So much drama.  So much dysfunction.  Drugs, sex, rock and roll.  All the elements of a Hollywood blockbuster.  Slash running naked through a golf course.  Axl having sex with a band mates girlfriend....and recording the audio for use on "Rocket Queen".  They all almost died in a car crash.  Axl punched...well a lot of people.  And they have started riots.  Just another day in the life of GNR.  This one should be in production now.  However, we all know Axl will want to be a major part of it.  So it will take another 13 years and he'll fight to call it "Japanese Communism".