The newest installment of the "Star Wars" franchise is out this weekend. Here are the biggest surprises you'll see in "Rogue One: A Star Wars Story".

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  • When Darth Vader takes off his helmet, he puts on a "Make the Galaxy Great Again" baseball hat.
  • It spends a lot of time on Jabba the Hutt's backstory as head of Fox News.
  • There's a scene early on where you can actually see Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher having sex in the background.
  • Jar Jar Binks launches a successful career giving anti-bullying speeches.
  • The rebels are beaten to the Death Star map by Nicolas Cage.
  • George Lucas interrupts a scene to tell the characters how he would've made them suck.
  • Batman accuses Darth Vader of stealing his cape.
  • Young R2-D2 is played by an 8-volt battery.
  • At this point in his life, Darth Vader's ominous breathing is more of a light wheeze.
  • It's not that bad.
  • Halfway through it, George Lucas wanders on-screen and finally apologizes for the prequels.
  • The good guys defeat the villain by giving him a cocktail prepared by Bill Cosby.
  • The second hour is a gripping biopic on the life and times of Jar Jar Binks.
  • The film closes with the Ewoks singing a delightful song about how 9/11 was a government conspiracy.
  • The Rebels take a solemn vow to protect all of the galaxy's people. Except, of course, the French.
  • Halfway through the movie, there's a tender lovemaking scene between Yoda and Jar Jar.
  • The movie consists of 90 minutes of footage of billions of dollars being delivered to the home of George Lucas.
  • Due to product placement by Pantene, fifteen minutes of the movie is Chewbacca getting his fur conditioned.
  • Jabba the Hutt won't shut up for the whole movie about how he's on Jenny Craig.
  • Darth Vader goes to Trump Tower to meet with Donald Trump about a cabinet position.
  • It's a new movie in 2016 and Kevin Hart isn't in it.
  • All the male cast members are trying to fight hair loss. Oh sorry, that's a surprise in "ROGAINE One: A Star Wars Story".