Illinois Woman Facing Felony Charge For Stealing 31 Boxes of Condoms

Apparently this woman was getting prepared to have more sex in the next few years than I've had in my entire life.

25-year-old Shaearion Davis from East St. Louis, Illinois was busted stealing Trojan condoms from a grocery store on Tuesday afternoon, a lot of Trojan condoms.

Shaearion stole 31 boxes of 'em. And since Trojans come in packs of anywhere from 10 to 36, that means she was stealing enough to get-it-on between 310 and 1,116 times before those condoms expire in a few years. Now that's impressive.

She's been charged with felony retail theft. If she'd just stolen a couple fewer boxes, she'd only be looking at a misdemeanor, but those 31 boxes crossed the $300 threshold, which pushed the charge up to a felony in Illinois.

Now she's looking at up to five years in prison.

Read more at The Smoking Gun.