We are well into the holiday shopping season and the parking lots are sure showing it. Follow the rules in the Holiday Parking Lot Constitution that Michaels and myself established years ago.

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Our good friend Johnny Marx wrote a great article about parking during the holidays. Read it at the Dispatch • Argus – QCOnline.com.

  • Rule 01.0 – If you pass an open space, you can not back up to get it. Once it's passed, it is a free space again.
  • Rule 02.0 – No crossing through parking spaces into another aisle.
  • Rule 03.0 – Once the driver has been seated in his or her vehicle, the space must be vacated within 30 seconds.
  • Rule 03.1 – Make-up application shall be prohibited while in parking lot.
  • Rule 04.0 – If two cars approach the same empty space from opposite directions, the car to signal first shall be entitled to the space.
  • Rule 05.0 – There shall be no backing up into parking spaces.
  • Rule 06.0 – There shall be no parking in front of the stores (loading zone) while the passenger "runs in for a second".
  • Rule 07.0 – All shopping carts shall be returned to the cart corrals.
  • Rule 08.0 – All pedestrians shall walk to the sides of the traffic lanes. Parents shall hold their children's hands to keep them out of the traffic lane.
  • Rule 09.0 – Shoppers walking to their cars to drop off packages, who intend to return to the store, shall signal their intentions so as not to cause other drivers to wait for that space.
  • Rule 10.0 – If, when pulling into a space, you find a space open in front of you, you may not pull forward into that space.
  • Rule 11.0 – One space per car. Period.
  • Rule 12.0 – When waiting for a parking spot to open, you must allow the person backing out enough room to do so.
  • Rule 13.0 – When lanes in a parking lot are designated with an arrow to indicate the direction of traffic, absolutely NO cars will travel in the opposite direction of the arrow.
  • Rule 14.0 – On December 24, all shoppers will yield to single, desperate, frazzled male shoppers.

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